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But while many see no issue with it, more than a few Asian women find it deeply frustrating. A lot. I had to deal with this bullshit so much in the past. Luckily not so much now.

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So she set out to expose the men who only see the stereotypical domestic, submissive and highly sexual creature, and not the person. In her first feature-length film, "Seeking Asian Female," which airs tonight at 10 p. ET on PBS's "Independent Lens," Lum gets drawn into the complicated relationship of a Professional black males dating website white man and his year-old mail-order bride.

Lum told ABCNews.

Men with 'yellow fever' get a taste of their own medicine

Steven, a twice-divorced garage attendant at the San Francisco Airport, has been unabashedly trolling the website Asian Asia Friend Finder for Ripon sex tonight years looking for a Chinese bride. As the film opens, viewers learn Steven, an aging and unlikely lover with an impish grin, has had scores of relationships online, but none have panned out.

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He gave me incredible insight into what men were thinking. About Asian women, but it was more than that, I was drawn to his complexity as a character. Over the course of a year as the filmmaker follows Steven, he meets Sandy, who becomes an eager pen pal.

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He visits her in China and Sandy agrees to come to California to marry him. Sandy speaks barely a word of English and the couple struggles to communicate -- and to get along in an apartment where Steven has lived as a bachelor for 20 years.

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Sandy gets annoyed with the years of clutter and eventually finds evidence online of Steven's obsession with other Asian women. Viewers watch Lum get pulled deeper into their lives Looking for a playroom translator, psychiatrist and ultimately marriage counselor.

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As the turbulent relationship unfolds, the stereotypes disappear Beautiful housewives seeking flirt Reno Nevada both Steven and Sandy become real human beings coping, not always successfully, with the ups and downs of a real marriage.

Lum said she began the film more than a decade ago with a much more academic approach. The phenomenon is acutely familiar to Asian women, according to Goal Auzeen Saedi, a post-doctoral fellow in counseling at Stanford University and contributor to Psychology Today.

Photo gallery (click to enlarge)

The perception is that they Detroit girls fuck sexy and "submissive. There is a national denial that of the fact that we all have this racist element to us. Researchers at Columbia University have looked at so-called "microaggressions" -- the Ladies seeking sex tonight MN Kasson 55944 that in this age of political correctness, racism has become "very covert and subtle," she said.

I make the assumption that if I need help with my math problem, I go ask an Asian student.

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Men who have fetishes for Asian women send an "underlying message about power, dominance and white privilege," said Saedi. Free sex tonight Boley Oklahoma, who said she grew up feeling an "invisible" minority in St. Louis, first began to notice these men while going to college on the East Coast. And now in San Francisco, which she calls "the epicenter of yellow fever," it is unavoidable. Men come up to you in a way that really looks like a stare, which lasts a bit longer than it should.

You can feel it.

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It's like they are looking through you. But after making the film, Lum began to see Steven as more complex person, with real emotions for Sandy.

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She couldn't make him a "pariah," and as she got more involved with the couple, he became "surprisingly endearing. At first things go well.

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Steven loses 16 pounds, living on "sex and vegetables. She plans the wedding of her dreams paid for by his brother. Sandy plans to study to be a nurse.

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But trouble erupts when Sandy finds old s between Steven and a former Chinese girlfriend, Molly. He struggles to explain to her that that relationship was in the past and that he, indeed, loves Hot lady seeking casual sex Chandler. As Sandy and Steven began to quarrel, Lum said she decided to go with the drama.

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But soon, she mediated arguments, speaking in Chinese to Sandy and translating back to Steven. Jealousies ensue over Steven's past relationships, and eventually the couple separates for Female seeking couple Pittsburgh months as Sandy lives with American friends. Even Lum gets ensnared in the arguments, as Steven tells her bluntly, "You are not God -- you're just a director.

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In the end, this relationship that both Lum and the viewers expect to fail, triumphs over cross-cultural misunderstandings. Lum hopes that the film will start a conversation. Steven's "obsession with any Asian woman has been replaced with a real-live Sandy," she says at the end of the film.

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Lum admits she had assumed negative stereotypes about Sandy, as well. The story is about expectations and stereotypes, which are very related -- stereotypes about white guys, and expectations going into a relationship. But four years, that's longer than Hollywood.

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An Asian fetish is a strong sexual or romantic preference for persons of Asian descent, specifically East or Southeast Asian descent and sometimes South Asian descent.

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I groaned as all the s I had ignored collided like pieces of Tetris and sank deep into my gut.